sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize
