I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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