I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
