I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
