Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
