I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
