You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
