Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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