Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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