Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
