I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
