i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
areolas are like halos for boobs.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
