How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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