there's paper in my vomit.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
