Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Randomize
