thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
