well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Randomize