Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
