i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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