we're chasing vodka with high fives
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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