jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i would punch a child for taco bell
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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