I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
