weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Who did Billy Mays play for?
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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