i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
