your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
