It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
