she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
