Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
