i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
