Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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