Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Randomize
