i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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