Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
So much rum. So many feels.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
