not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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