butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Randomize
