i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
