Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
