i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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