Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Randomize
