the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize