have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
