Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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