check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
