Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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