I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I can't turn off my feet"
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
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