guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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