His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
