The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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