i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
