what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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