so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Randomize
